Cold in Alaska
by TinyPiano
Summary: This story is my take on ‘Cry Your Name’ and the episodes following it. It follows Liz and how she deals with the loss of Alex. This will be somewhat dreamer based although it won’t seem like it at first. Read and enjoy!
1. I'll Keep it With Mine

Title: Cold in Alaska  
Author: Me  
Summary: This story is my take on 'Cry Your Name' and the episodes  
following it. It follows Liz and how she deals with the loss of Alex. This  
will be somewhat dreamer based although it won't seem like it at first.  
Read and enjoy!  
Disclaimer: I own absolutely nothing so leave me alone.  
A/N: This is my first real fan fic! Write feed back please you don't have  
to be nice, just write what you think I won't be angry. I'll post more as  
soon as I can.  
  
Chapter 1  
  
I'll Keep It With Mine  
  
It's true. What they say about stars. How most of the stars you see aren't  
even there anymore, how they died long ago but we just can't tell. That's  
how I feel. The whole thing with future Max seemed like the end for me.  
Like that was it, I was done. But I had no idea. It just doesn't compare to  
what I feel now.  
Liz was staring at the van as her friends left. It seemed unreal to her. It  
just didn't make sense, it couldn't make sense. She needed it to not make  
sense. So she continued staring at the van, waiting for the nightmare to  
end.  
"Liz?" Max spoke softly "Liz are you ok?"  
Without breaking her gaze she spoke "Go after her Max" her voice sounded  
strange even to her. Like someone else was saying it.  
"Liz please."  
"You should go after her Max" Tess cut in. And with that he and Tess turned  
and went after Isabel. And Liz stayed. She felt safer this way. Alone. But  
she was suddenly overcome by the need to see her friend. Her mind coming up  
with excuses for this whole incident. Maybe Max was wrong, maybe that's not  
even Alex. Someone really should make sure. Why shouldn't it be her? Not  
turning her eyes away from the van, she almost felt like she couldn't. Like  
it would be wrong. She started walking towards the van. Slowly at first,  
then she broke into a sprint. She needed to make sure. She reached for the  
handle and pulled open the door, she stepped inside and closed it behind  
her. Kneeling next to the body bag she slowly unzipped it and peeled back  
the plastic.  
"No." the single word left her body more like a sigh then real speech. And  
with that final sigh everything seemed to leave her. She leaned forward  
kissed his forehead and zipped the bag back up. A single tear slipped down  
her face, and she left. She slowly walked to the park leaving everything  
that was real and alive back in that van with her best friend. She reached  
the park and sat in on a bench. Her brain trying to make sense of this.  
this tragedy. This wasn't right, this isn't right. But after what seemed  
like hours of trying to convince herself it wasn't true, she gave in.  
"Alex is dead" 


	2. Don't Talk

Chapter 2  
  
Don't Talk  
  
I've never felt like this before, it's like I left all my sanity with  
Alex's corpse. I still can't  
believe it. For some reason saying Alex is dead feels more like giving up  
then anything else. I have this feeling that this is my fault. When future  
Max came he didn't say anything about Alex dying. He would have warned me  
wouldn't he have? I know that when I changed things I did this, Alex is  
dead because of me. Me.  
  
Liz is wandering around a junkyard. As she spots what she has been  
searching for she jogs over to it. Alex's car. She crawls through the  
window and looks inside. The first thing she sees is his blood splattered  
over the driver's seat, she touches the dried blood trying to feel Alex's  
presence in the car. Suddenly she sees a picture of him and Leanna. Alex'  
face is ripped out of the picture.  
Liz walked through the hallway to her locker at school. It was weird being  
back at school. Everyone was acting different, people were staring at her.  
But she didn't notice she just walked to her locker. As she rounded the  
corner she saw it. His locker, it was covered in flowers and pictures of  
him, a memorial for him. When she saw Maria, Michael not far behind, she  
walked up to her and took a second to view her friend's tear streaked face  
before hugging her. Maria pulled back.  
"How are you doing?" Liz asked  
"Not good" Maria's voice was trying so hard to keep from drowning in the  
sobs that she had tried so hard to suppress.  
"Try and get through the day, okay? Just keep moving forward. Keep  
breathing" Liz said calmly.  
"How are you" she searched her friends eyes.  
"I'm fine" Liz said stoically "Look at this" she pulls out the picture.  
"Oh my God!"  
"Is that." Michael questioned  
"Yeah it's Leanna and Alex, I found it in the wreck."  
"Oh my God I can't believe you'd go there, are you sick?" Maria leans  
against Michael.  
"This means something! Why is Alex's head missing?"  
"Stop it! Stop it! This is wrong I can't do this!" Maria says in a hushed  
voice before walking off. Michael chased after her.  
Liz was walking slowly on the football field she could see Max and Tess  
under the bleachers. But she was walking towards the throng of people  
gathered on the field. She sees an enlarged picture of Alex surrounded by  
flowers and people crying. It was hard for her to understand how so many  
people could pretend to be in pain over the death of some one they didn't  
know. But it was the voice of a boy that caught Liz's attention. It was the  
guy who had delivered Alex's pizza, the last person he had talked to.  
"So, finally, I left. He was losing it and you could totally see it in his  
eyes. I mean, he was on his way out of this life."  
"Is that a fact?" Liz' voice was strangled. The group of people listening  
dispersed.  
"Hey, look I'm sorr."  
"I'd like to ask you some questions if you have the time" He nods "What did  
he say to you?"  
"I don't know. I mean, 'Life isn't right.' Or 'Life is wrong.' Something  
like that"  
"And what did you say?"  
"Well, I said, whatever dude."  
"Whatever dude? That's your reaction to a man who is devastated and on his  
way out of this life? Isn't that how you describe him to your fan cub?"  
"Look, I wasn't--I mean, uh--I'm sorry I sounded like that." Stuttering  
"Yeah. If you remember anything else... anything. My parents own the  
Crashdown, you can usually find me there." Liz walks away from the boy. She  
looks back to the bleachers and sees the whole gang there, she didn't want  
to talk to them right now she had places to be.  
Liz pulls the photo out of her pocket to show it to Valenti.  
"This photo means something, I know it does." She stated firmly  
"I don't know Liz." he trails off trying to avoid her stare.  
"What? You know something don't you? This is a clue isn't it?"  
"Liz I think maybe you should go home and rest, it's been a long day and."  
"No" she cuts him off trying to regain her composure "What does this mean  
to you?"  
"Fine I'll tell you but you're not going to like what I have to say"  
"Just tell me"  
"Ok. It's starting to look like Alex swerved his car into the oncoming  
traffic on purpose."  
"What are you saying?" her voice rising in tone  
"I'm saying that Alex's attitude had changed before he." struggling to find  
the words "Before the accident, people had noticed mood swings, he hasn't  
been focusing."  
"Oh please" Liz sounded exasperated  
"Liz I interviewed the truck driver I saw the accident scene."  
"You're telling me that Alex killed himself over bad grades?!"  
"I don't know why Alex did what he did, but you're right this picture means  
something. He defaced his own image Liz, doesn't that mean anything to  
you?"  
Liz runs from the house, trying hard not to cry. She stops on the side walk  
to think about what he just said. She starts to cough before falling to her  
knees and vomiting on the grass. She gets up trying to collect herself,  
trying to calm down. She turns and starts to walk towards the Evans' house.  
Liz looks in the window and sees Max trying on his suit, for the funeral.  
She knocks on the window. He is surprised to see her, he walks over and  
opens the window.  
"Liz.?" he looks at her, confused. She looks pale, tired, hurt.  
"Max I don't want to be alone right now. Can. can I stay here tonight?"  
"Of course" She steps through the window.  
"Max, Valenti said that Alex killed himself." She searches his eyes for  
comfort  
"That's crazy" he seems angry  
"I know that's what I said"  
"Alex would never kill himself"  
"No! Of course not! It's ridiculous. And, you know what's going to happen.  
Hanson is going to go and he's going to put that report and it's going to  
be in the newspaper for every single person to read. All of his friends,  
his family."  
"No" Max jumps up from where he's been sitting  
"Alex Whitman's death was declared a suicide yesterday by the Roswell  
Sheriff's Department!"  
"We won't let that happen!"  
"Just the fact that his parents have to go through this.this nightmare.  
They do not need to think that their son." She sits down leaning against  
his bed, no longer able to hold back the tears. She lets them fall freely  
down her cheeks. Max comes over and sits down next to Liz.  
"I'll take care of it" He puts his hand on her back, she leans into him and  
he holds her as she cries. She suddenly pulls back, she knows she can't do  
this. She gets up.  
"Liz" He looks up at her "its ok." He stands up next to her  
"Max I just wanted to tell you that I saw you and Tess kissing at Prom"  
"Liz."  
"It's ok" she cuts him off "I'm glad you're moving on, I just wanted to  
tell you that I saw it. Ok?"  
"Ok."  
"You deserve to be happy Max" he starts to say something but she cuts him  
off "Just tell me you'll always be my friend Max, can you do that for me."  
Begging him quietly  
"You know I will"  
Liz climbs back out the window. Scolding herself for slipping like that.  
She needed to be strong right now, for Alex. 


	3. Hurricaine

A/N: The song is She Cries Your Name by Beth Orton and also there is  
Amazing Grace (but that's public domain so who cares?) Read and enjoy!  
Please write feedback and don't lie, say exactly what you thought of it! I  
won't care, just tell me the truth!  
  
Chapter 3  
  
Hurricane  
  
Alex didn't deserve this. People thinking he killed himself, it makes me  
sick. How could anyone believe that about Alex? For the first time in a  
while he was happy, he had Isabel. What changed? What could have happened  
that would have made him do that to himself? He didn't, he couldn't have. I  
have to find out what happened I can't let them think he would do this.  
Alex has been there for me for as long as I can remember, it's my turn to  
help him.  
  
'The earth shall soon dissolve like snow the sun for bade to shine. But God  
who called me here below will be forever mine. Yes when this flesh and  
heart do fail and mortal life shall cease I shall possess within the veil a  
life of Joy and Peace. Amazing Grace how sweet the sound that saved a  
wretch like me I once was lost but now am found was blind but now I see.'  
  
Maria's strong voice cut through the silence, she could hear the pain in  
her friend's voice. Everyone could hear her struggling not to cry. Liz  
stood with a stoic look on her face staring at the casket embedded in the  
ground. Max kept glancing over at her, she could tell he was worried. But  
she was to busy to reassure him, she couldn't stop until she found the  
truth. She threw a flower on top of the wooden box. It was hard to believe  
that Alex was in there. It was even harder to believe that they were about  
to cover him in 6 feet of dirt. As everyone walked off she stayed for a  
minute longer.  
  
"I won't fail you this time Alex. I promise." The words fell softly on the  
casket. She turned and walked to the car. As they were driving away she saw  
Max talking to Valenti. She prayed that he could stop this madness.  
  
Liz wandered around the Whitman's back yard, she saw Alex' father standing  
by the pool. It hurt her to see him, he looked so sad. She couldn't even  
imagine how hard this must be for him. She approached him, he was so much  
taller then her. It was strange to see he seemed so small, so wounded.  
  
"Hi Mr. Whitman." She kept her voice quiet, as if she were trying to take  
the pain that was clearly written on his face away.  
"Liz, how are you doing" He sounded different.  
"I'm ok"  
"Well, I uh. I hope you know how much Alex loved you and Maria. He just  
thought the world of you two" He stumbled through his words. Liz tried hard  
not to cry at these words.  
"Thank you. Could I ask you favor?"  
"Sure anything"  
"I was just wondering if. if I could just sit in his room for a while?"  
"I haven't been able to go in there yet. But sure go ahead."  
"Thank you" She leaned in and hugged him before turning away.  
She walked through their house, the silence closing in on her. She had been  
in this house so many times. She had been in here the day Alex had died, it  
had seemed so different then. Now she could feel the weight of so many  
years of memories bearing down on her. She stepped into his room, she sits  
on his bed and picks up his guitar. Plucking the strings a little.  
  
"I really need your help. I know something's wrong. I know what they're  
saying about you isn't true. But I don't know where to go from here. I  
really wish you could--give me some advice, point my in a direction." She  
spoke the words to the room her eyes closed. A tear slipped down her cheek.  
She wiped it away quickly and opened her eyes, scanning the room for an  
answer. She sees a book, she stands up and walks over to the desk where it  
lays. The Poetry of Robert Frost. She opens the book two tickets fall out  
"The woods are lovely, dark and deep, but I have promises to keep and miles  
to go before I sleep and miles to go before I sleep." She reads from the  
marked pages. She picks the tickets up, they're tickets to a Beth Orton  
concert.  
"Thank you" She whispers to the room. Liz walks out of the room to look for  
the others.  
The whole gang is sitting in Alex' room.  
"Everything I'm about to say is going to come as a shock to most of you but  
something happened. And you need to know what's going on. Valenti and  
Hanson are about to declare Alex's death a suicide."  
"What!?" Isabel stands up from where she is sitting.  
"How could they say that? It can't be true" Maria's voice is hoarse from  
crying.  
"Well, I'm not so sure" Max sounds defeated. Liz turns and looks at him,  
she doesn't understand what he's saying. Last night he had believed her.  
"Max we talked about this."  
"Valenti showed me his file" Cutting her off.  
"Oh he showed you the file" Her voice dripping with sarcasm.  
"I don't want to believe it either but I saw the evidence. It's pretty  
convincing"  
"I can't believe it's suicide" Michael speaking up for the first time.  
"It wasn't a suicide and I can prove it." She shows them the tickets. "Five  
minutes ago I found these here, in Alex' room. They are concert tickets to  
Beth Orton. Alex bought them on the day he died probably for him and  
Isabel. The concert is tonight. Don't you get it? You don't buy concert  
tickets on the day you kill yourself. You don't make plans for the future  
when you are not planning on having a future."  
"I don't know. A couple of concert tickets are not much to go on." Tess  
offers.  
"You don't know what the hell you're talking about!" Maria growls  
"What's your problem" she snaps back  
"My best friend is dead! Why don't you get the hell out of here! Everything  
was better before you came back" Maria is ready to snap.  
"Hey. Hey. There's nothing to gain with this argument one way or another.  
We know Alex. We know what kind of guy he is, and we know he'd never kill  
himself." Michael steps in.  
"Exactly" she says holding on to Michael.  
"So as far as any of us are concerned it was an accident"  
"It wasn't an accident" Max looks up at Liz. She looks tired, dark circles  
under her eyes her voice is hoarse. "He was murdered"  
"Murdered?" Kyle questions.  
"Would you listen to yourself? Who could possibly want to murder Alex?" Max  
sounds annoyed.  
"I don't know yet, maybe someone with a grudge against him or an alien"  
"That's not what happened here" He steps towards her.  
"Would you just think about it for a minute? If there is anything any of us  
should have learned over the last year and a half it's that nothing is ever  
what it seems."  
"What is that? That's not evidence!" Isabel's voice rising  
"Keep your voices down" Tess whispers  
"You cannot deny the fact that a key member of this conspiracy just died  
under very suspicious circumstances."  
"I'm with Liz. Some things not right about this" Kyle stands up.  
"It was a traffic accident" Max's tone becoming more aggressive.  
"And what would an alien want with Alex?"  
"Maybe Isabel." pointing towards her.  
"No" Isabel's voice is low.  
"We know there's an alien named Khivar who wants to bring Isabel back to  
your world"  
"No." Her voice getting louder  
"If he found out about her and Alex maybe he would."  
"NO! NO! NO!" cutting Liz off "You're just making this up!"  
"You don't know what you're talking about!" Max face to face with Liz "You  
don't know anything about our world!" He grabs her shoulders  
"You don't want to think that Alex was killed by an alien because that  
would mean you are responsible." Staring Max in the eyes. He suddenly  
realizes what she's saying, he releases his tight grip on her shoulders.  
Disgusted with himself as he sees her shoulders bleeding a little. He turns  
around and leaves the room, the other aliens follow. Leaving the three  
humans behind, what was once a close knit group is now split in half. Liz  
noticed the small pain in her shoulders, but she couldn't stop to wonder  
what had snapped in Max to make him hurt her. She'd have to do this alone  
for now.  
"I know what I know. And I am going to find out the truth. I owe that to my  
friend."  
Turning from her friends she left the room. As she left the room she heard  
Kyle say  
"Well. I guess it's us versus them." He didn't know how true that was.  
Falling from the western selves  
To find yourself alone again  
Wonderin' where you have been.  
Your lonely voice  
Calls across the star lit coast  
Reaching out to be seen.  
She cries your name  
Three times again  
She cries your name  
How long can this love remain?  
Cut beneath the surface screen  
Of what we say and what we seem  
Is a truth to be seen?  
She keeps cryin out your name  
But her scream sounds the same  
How fickle fate can be...  
She cries your name  
Three times again  
She cries your name  
How long can this love remain?  
Birds would scream for territory  
Can learn to sing euphorically  
Give a hand time and hands ring out  
And there's a wasteland in your soul  
The burned out trees would leave you cold  
Leave a hand out and I'll deal  
She cries your name  
Three times again  
She cries your name  
How long can this love remain?  
She cries your name  
Twelve times again  
She cries your name  
How long can this love remain?  
  
Liz sat in the Crashdown going through pictures of Alex, the rain pounding  
down on the small restaurant. She sat there remembering Alex. The time he  
stripped for Isabel, when he and Kyle were stuck underground, when he  
helped her with Topolsky, when she told him the truth about the aliens,  
when she and Maria first met Alex. Every memory flashing through her head  
like a bolt of lightning, there one minute and gone the next. The emotions  
overwhelmed her and for the first time she really cried for Alex, she broke  
down and let herself hurt for him. An endless amount of tears poured down  
her face her body shaking from the sobs. She was interrupted by a knocking  
on the door. She wipes the tears from her face and walks over to open the  
door. She is met by a soaking wet Boy, the boy who delivered Alex' food.  
"I thought about what you said. You know, if I remembered anything? Look."  
He takes a piece of paper from his pocket. "I got his credit card receipt.  
The company kicked it back 'cause of the way he signed it." He hands the  
paper to her.  
"11100100100111011001" She reads from the paper  
"Does this mean anything to you?" he looks confused  
"It means, I have promises to keep and miles to go before I sleep." Her  
voice barely above a whisper. Knowing what she has to do now, she smiles to  
her self. She can help him now, she can start helping him.  
"Miles to go before I sleep" 


End file.
